.
This is honestly more of a vent than anything, but I honestly can’t take this anymore. My life is honestly becoming unbearable, I no longer have any strength to try and keep this faith that only causes me constat emotional pain and distress. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in this way, I also don’t want to be some kind of toy or slave to God because of his will or anything. I wanna absolutely end this and leave it all behind, I had enough and want to quit, but I honestly don’t know how to do it. Nothing that I can think about is even remotely enough to allow me to leave in peace and just go along with my life. I honestly just want to stop.
.
You have not lived as a true Christian but as a religionist, as a mere Christian in name. A Christian in name is by no means a true follower of Christ. Within the habit of repeating sin and repentance, sin and repentance until death, you are experiencing how that sin continually pricks your conscience, leaving it increasingly deprived, empty, and even anxious. Therefore, you cannot have the fruit and evidence of Christ.
Christians mistakenly believe themselves to be true Christians. The tragic reality today is that, in the height of such arrogance, they are in so severe a condition that they no longer even feel the pangs of conscience. It is utter devastation. Because they increasingly excuse and rationalize their sins, Christians come to take their sins lightly, or grow bolder regarding their sins, or even become proud and shameless about their sins. Such a zealous faith is nothing more than a faith in which the devil works; it is not the faith that unites in the beautiful love of Christ.
Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him. Little children, let no man deceive you: he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as he is righteous. He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil. Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God. In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God, neither he that loveth not his brother.(1 John 3 : 6~10)
But God be thanked, that ye were the servants of sin, but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you. Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness. I speak after the manner of men because of the infirmity of your flesh: for as ye have yielded your members servants to uncleanness and to iniquity unto iniquity; even so now yield your members servants to righteousness unto holiness. For when ye were the servants of sin, ye were free from righteousness. What fruit had ye then in those things whereof ye are now ashamed? for the end of those things is death. But now being made free from sin, and become servants to God, ye have your fruit unto holiness, and the end everlasting life. For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.(Romans 6 : 17~23)
The faith of a true Christian does not commit sin, and it is freed from sin. In other words, today’s Christians, who are no different from unbelievers—sinning, regretting, and repenting, yet turning back to sin again in the vicious cycle of sin—cannot escape this bondage and have no true fruit or evidence of being Christians; therefore, they are by no means true Christians. Yet, because they feel no pang of conscience over their lack of fruit, they shamelessly and stubbornly claim that they are saved, that they have received the Holy Spirit, and that the power of God is at work in them, even while they continue to repeat sin. Such behavior only denies and opposes the love of God and His power.
The truth of God is to lead us to receive the power that enables us to put to death the evil habits of man, which otherwise compel him to repeat sin and repentance, sin and repentance throughout his entire life. By this power, one is set free from sin and led to live as a child of God who does not commit sin. If you truly desire to become a child of God, then seek out a shepherd who teaches the power of God.
By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us. For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die. But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him. For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life.(Romans 5 : 2~10)
For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men, Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world; Looking for that blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Saviour Jesus Christ; Who gave himself for us, that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar people, zealous of good works. These things speak, and exhort, and rebuke with all authority. Let no man despise thee.(Titus 2 : 11~15)
That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God; Strengthened with all might, according to his glorious power, unto all patience and longsuffering with joyfulness; Giving thanks unto the Father, which hath made us meet to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in light:…(Colossians 1 : 10~14)
Through sermons that exalt only words and theories, people awaken, resolve, and determine again and again until the day they die, and thus sin is inevitably repeated until death. The truth, and the true shepherd of God, is the one who leads us to receive the power of God that enables us to break free from this yoke and limitation of sin, in which sin can only be repeated until death. This shepherd is here. Go to the Moses’ Burning Bush website(https://mosesbush.com), and truly become a child who is led to obtain the power of God that helps you, within God’s love, to grow in His beautiful character. Also, Refer the e-book named Moses’ Burning Bush. (Author : Yo Han Lee)
The power of God is that, by supplying us with His love, that love becomes nourishment to our hearts and causes us to grow. Receive this truth of the power of love.