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Regarding marriage, Malachi 2:15 states: “Has not the one God made you? You belong to him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring.” I am considering marrying a woman who I love very deeply. However, she has a genetic condition that, if it were passed on to our children, could cause them to be mentally disabled (she is not mentally disabled, but the condition could cause varying levels mental disability in children, from mild to severe). If my children are mentally disabled, am I still fulfilling God’s wish that we have Godly offspring as stated in Malachi 2:15?
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I suppose therefore that this is good for the present distress, I say, that it is good for a man so to be. Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife. But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you…. But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife. There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband. And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction.(1 Corinthians 7 : 26~35)
Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man’s foes shall be they of his own household. He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me. He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.(Matthew 10 : 34~39)
Scripture says that it is more blessed not to marry. This is because if one marries and then loves his wife of the flesh more than God, while claiming to believe in Him, this is not true faith in God. In other words, most pastors teach under the banner of family peace, family harmony, and family happiness. Yet the Bible says that Christ came to set a man against his household. Faith that places family first is faith of the flesh, and faith of the flesh conceives only sin. This is the fundamental reason why all believers alike spend their lives repeating the cycle of sinning and repenting, sinning and repenting, until death. Most of the prophets did not marry, and this is the reason why.
However, if you desire to marry in order to care for someone who is disabled, no one will stop you. Yet still, Scripture says that it is more blessed not to marry. The form of faith among Christians today is to serve God while mingling with the world and material wealth, chasing after every kind of corruption, heresy, and falsehood. And the pretext is always the happiness of the family. There is even a passage that says Esau could not bring repentance because he sought only his blessing and happiness.
Lest there be any fornicator, or profane person, as Esau, who for one morsel of meat sold his birthright. For ye know how that afterward, when he would have inherited the blessing, he was rejected: for he found no place of repentance, though he sought it carefully with tears.(Hebrews 12 : 16~17)
If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple.(Luke 14 : 26~27)
This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you.(John 15 : 12~14)
For none of us liveth to himself, and no man dieth to himself.(Romans 14 : 7)
The reason God created mankind was not so that they might eat well, live well, be happy, and receive blessings. Rather, it was so that they might deny their own fleshly happiness, blessings, and success, take up the cross, deny themselves, and pursue the love that can sacrifice even their very lives. That love—the love that sacrifices oneself—is to be received from God, and with that as their goal, living the life of Christ in pursuit of the hope of Christ is what it means to be a true Christian. But Christians today are not true Christians.
Far from being an example and model like the light and salt, they are preoccupied with outward appearances—pretending to be holy, kind, and good. Their behavior inside the church is different from outside, their outward appearance differs from their inner reality, and their words do not match their actions. With this duplicity, and with only their outward manner of conduct refined, such Christians can never become true Christians. The salvation they claim cannot be found anywhere in Scripture, and the results of relying on themselves—striving, resolving, and making determinations—only produce, according to circumstances and self-interest, the inevitable cause of sin.
Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.(John 8 : 34)
Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him. Little children, let no man deceive you: he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as he is righteous. He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil. Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God. In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God, neither he that loveth not his brother.(1 John 3 :6~10)
But God be thanked, that ye were the servants of sin, but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you. Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness. I speak after the manner of men because of the infirmity of your flesh: for as ye have yielded your members servants to uncleanness and to iniquity unto iniquity; even so now yield your members servants to righteousness unto holiness. For when ye were the servants of sin, ye were free from righteousness. What fruit had ye then in those things whereof ye are now ashamed? for the end of those things is death. But now being made free from sin, and become servants to God, ye have your fruit unto holiness, and the end everlasting life. For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.(Romans 6 : 17~23)
The Bible calls those who continue to repeat sin the children of the devil, but the children of God do not commit sin, for the children of God are set free from sin. Therefore, when you are asking yourself, “Should it be this or that?”, both will certainly become a problem and sin before God. If there must be a second-best option, then perhaps not having children would be a lighter burden for you to bear. Yet even if one marries a healthy woman, life in this world is not easy. The word of God that says it is more blessed not to marry is the very message He has spoken to you.
And woe unto them that are with child, and to them that give suck in those days! But pray ye that your flight be not in the winter, neither on the sabbath day: For then shall be great tribulation, such as was not since the beginning of the world to this time, no, nor ever shall be.(Matthew 24 : 19~21)
But woe unto them that are with child, and to them that give suck, in those days! for there shall be great distress in the land, and wrath upon this people.(Luke 21 : 23)